“Perhaps the truth depends on a walk around a lake”
Wallace Stevens in Notes Toward a Supreme Fiction.
While reading the other day, I came across the quote, “Perhaps the truth depends on a walk around a lake.” It occurred to me that this is the perfect thought for a happy retirement relationship.
Being together all day long on a regular basis occasionally causes friction for even the most compatible retired couples. The frequency of togetherness may increase the possibility of one partner innocently saying or doing something that annoys the other. Sometimes sparks fly for no apparent reason and cause confusion in the relationship.
The above quote resonated with me because I often heard couples express confusion over a partner’s response to something he or she did. We all have probably experienced situations where we say or do something that confounds our mate and both are left wondering how and why a disagreement happened. More often than not, the confusion can be resolved with a conversation. If that doesn’t happen easily however, it might be time for one or both partners to take a walk—alone.
Some might fear that it’s walking out on the situation. However its a great way to enhance your retirement relationship.
Why take a walk?
Studies show that people feel less stressed after a quiet walk in nature than those who remain inside or in urban areas. Other studies show how the quiet stillness in nature enables brains to let down its sensory guard and think clearly.
Whether at a lake, in a park or on a beach, our minds often seek the truth of our feelings. You might find yourself wondering what really caused the conflict and how you can resolve it. It could be that the root of that conflict is unrelated to what you had just experienced. Often ways to resolve the conflict with grace and greater awareness of our partner’s concerns pop into our consciousness.
Does every retirement relationship experience some misunderstanding?
It’s the rare couple that doesn’t occasionally experience differences of opinion. In fact, if you don’t, it could mean that one of you isn’t thinking for him or herself. Different opinions are also the root of innovation and improvements.
Often couples’ differences can be resolved with patient conversations. However, when they can’t, head for nature. You’re likely to be pleased with the results.
Do you have a favorite way to reduce stress in your retirement relationship? What actions help you think more clearly? Please share your comments below. Someone is likely to benefit from your insights, and you will help make their world a better place.