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Compromise In Retirement: the secret to happiness


As many of you may note,  I’ve often written on the need to compromise in retirement with your partner. Most likely,that’s because it could be the most impactful action we can take for creating happiness in retirement. The increased need for compromise in retirement may be prompted by our more frequent togetherness. It could also be the result of each partner having established routines previously unnoticed by the other. Whatever the basic cause, a happy retirement typically requires  important adjustments. 

If you have already been through the retirement adjustment stage, you might  share these thoughts with your recently retired friends.  You could help them adjust to the joys of retirement more quickly. Or you could just read the comments and think, “Thank the heavens that’s over!” 

Compromise in Retirement: The Secret to Creating Happiness

Couples best achieve the dream of a happy retirement when there is agreement on how you will live your lives together. That doesn’t mean you have to do everything together. Instead, it means that what you choose to do doesn’t harm your life partner. 

If you want to travel, and your mate won’t fly, how do you resolve the difference? What if you live in a small condo and want to sleep in, but he’s up at 5 AM––what’s the solution? He wants to go out to dinner every evening, and you worry about the expense, how do you handle it? Or, your partner has become grumpy in retirement, and you’re not sure how to respond.

Finding Compromise in Retirement

There are no right or wrong solutions to any situations you may experience as newly retirees. However, making the commitment to finding compromises that work for both partners contributes greatly too living in harmony. At the very least, this commitment helps us realize that each partner is loved and is loving. 

What does it mean for you to feel loved, and what do you do to show your loving concern for your partner?  How do you react when you feel loved––are you more generous, more kind, more patient? Does feeling loved make you more loving?

These are important questions for all newly retired couples. From everything I have learned and experienced, early retirement requires a good deal of compromise.  Equally important is that compromise comes more easily when we care about the person with whom we must share that exercise.

When are we happiest?

A  happy and fulfilling retirement means different things to different people. For you, it may mean transitioning from a full-time career into meaningful part-time work. Or perhaps you envision spending more time with family, starting a garden or making regular visits to the golf course. Whatever your activity preferences, it’s helpful to know that a positive spouse/partner relationship is most important for retirement satisfaction.  

I hope you’ll go to the Comments section and share your thoughts. On the other hand, you might just feel better just expressing them to someone you love. Also, you could help others discover loving qualities in their lives.